1004 – Tig Notaro

 

PARDCAST.COM MESSAGE BOARD FOR THIS EPISODE

Intro

Jimmy is enjoying the aughts and weird eye-contact with the camera

Kale Krunch, blech

Dice’s Lady is protective about Dan

Smokin’ O.P.s (Pronounced Oh Pees)

Happy New Year!

Is Jimmy worried about the apocalypse?

James Woods and the 9/11 dry-run

5:00

“Please Come to Boston”

Even off-air, Jimmy can’t help insulting Eliot

Shrinky-Dinks: still fun, but let’s not talk about it

Matt is still The Administrator Squirrel

Jimmy has waited too long to have Tig Notaro on

Jimmy remembers going to sleep on 9/10/01

Tig’s credits

Tig’s podcast: Professor Blastoff

10:00

Tig couldn’t find the Never Not Funny Studio Complex

Episode 60, with just Matt and Jimmy, was the worst episode ever

Tig’s Conan sets are among Jimmy’s favorites

Check out Tig’s risk-taking set on Conan

Tig NO-TAR-O, not NO-TARE-O

15:00

Street Smarts, the game show

Jimmy’s adorable little creature Oliver

Tig wants to know about Oliver’s bathroom hygiene, infuriating Jimmy

20:00

Oliver makes a peepee joke

Car alarm near Jimmy’s house

Tig’s Leno-sighting in a Fiat 500

Tig’s Last Comic Standing refusal blocked her from The Tonight Show

25:00

Welcome to the holiday, pre-taped, kid’s-show edition of Never Not Funny

“How are cars made?”

Why Dan doesn’t have a microphone

Tig hates Purell

Danielle claps like Micky Mouse

Here begins the epic “together-out” clapping sequence

30:00

“By the way…” = “I want to talk now”

Together-out reprise

Matt’s annoying childhood music teacher: taaa-taaa-tee-tee-ta

Feigning painful urination

No one can remember “together-out” from 5 minutes ago

35:00

The bit no one can remember is already in the NNF Hall of Fame

Strangely incomplete Chicago band trivia about refusing a gig

“Together-out” causes an early break to go back and listen

EARLY BREAK

Yes, the listeners already knew it was “together-out”

40:00

The entire listening audience is furious

swaddling Oliver like a burrito

Cafe Gratitude’s ridiculous and humiliating menu item names

“You are a burrito”

45:00

Tig’s eating habits

Comedy coaching by Matt

Tig wants to tell a story without a punchline, but Matt is all up in her head about it, and anger abounds

Tig bikes from Montreal to Portland, Maine, resulting in a September 10, 2001 story

50:00

Tig’s bike route shadowed the 9/11 terrorists

This is proof that stories don’t need punchlines

55:00

Jimmy Pardo’s favorite movie is Breaking Away, and now it can be Googled

Tig cycles around Europe

Clipless bicycles have clips, but so do the ones without clips

Clips

More about clips

English words of pain in France

1:00:00

BREAK

Tig Ol’ Bitties: NOT a good name for Tig’s CD

Once again, Jimmy forgets “together-out”

The special bonus DVD from Tig: Tig at your party

1:05:00

Coerced into eating a cookie, Matt has adorable crumbs on his sweater

Zoe and Christmas at UCB: “Not this place!”

The Chipmunks are Oliver’s dudes

Anti-movie Oliver

Oliver’s first trip to McDonald’s

1:10:00

“You are a hunk of sausage”

Danielle’s nanny career

McDonald’s vs. Cafe Gratitude

Where does Tig not live?

1:15:00

Everything you need to know about Tig’s Mormon assistant

Waddle vs. toddle

Don’t call your mom hot, especially if she listens to your podcast

Gene Siskel vs. Matt’s step-father

Thank God Jimmy is a country boy

1:20:00

The Devil Went Down to Georgia

James Pardo’s fame helped him avoid a ticket

Jimmy should have used “Joseph Smith!” as a curse when yelling at Tig’s assistant

Australian-accented “tattoo”

Jimmy’s work schedule

1:25:00

Why the podcast goes for 90 minutes

Explaining Dice’s Lady

Negative comments about Tig do not bother her

1:30:00

Don’t bad-talk Jimmy on his own Facebook page

Welcome to Whisper Radio

The World’s Quietest Jingle Bells

“Together-out”

AK-47 gone, not forgotten

In-Studio notes by Dan Katz
0 – Jimmy has a connection with the listener. There’s a lady on the internet who wants Jimmy to stop being mean to Dan.5 – Jimmy made a great joke at Eliot’s expense. Jimmy remembers 9/10.

10 – Guest Tig Notaro did one of Jimmy’s favorite sets on Conan. Risk-taking.

15 – The guy’s talk about the fact that Jimmy doesn’t put toilet seat coverings on public toilet seats when he brings Oliver to the bathroom.

20 – Oliver peed standing up for the first time ever. Jimmy thinks he saw a stolen car get dumped in front of his house. Tig saw Jay Leno after doing Conan the other day.

25 – Tig tells a great karate story. The guys continue to try and properly pronounce Tig’s last name.

30 – The guys clap a lot. Tig loves to pretend she’s in pain whenever she’s in a public bathroom.

35 – Early break to figure out what everyone was saying during the clap game. The guys take another

40 – Tig talks about Café Gratitude. ***YOU ARE BURRITO***

45 – Tig tells the Goldilocks story and then tells her 9/10 story.

50 – Tig did a bike race on 9/10. It was 288 miles. The last 50 miles, her knee was blown out, and had to peddle one-legged. At the end of the story, 9/11 happens.

55 – Tig talks about bicycle training in France.

BREAK

0 – Tig should’ve named her stand-up album “Tig Ole Bitties.” Tig talks about some DVD’s that come for free with hard copies of her album.

5 – Jimmy took Oliver to McDonald’s for the first time ever.

10 – Interactions with Tig’s assistant.

15 – The guys talk step parents.

20 – It feels like we’re winding down.

25 – The guys talk about internet comments.

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